Good :)

Today has been an amazing day so far. I've been up and out of bed since 7.30am and I've done so many things already. I've planted seeds for cabbage, carrots, spring onions and spinach since we eat a lot of veg and I just happen to have a miniature gardening set that I won in a competition. It was to celebrate the release of Gnomeo and Juliet in cinema's and I was a runner up and received the set. It's awesome :) So I bought tubs and a propagation thing and planted my little seeds in the company of my little babies (the lambs kept in the shed). I also came in and sorted out washing, with 2 loads washed and dried, a third waiting to dry while my jeans are in, and just one more load to go. I've also made fairy cakes for taking up to my aunts and tied down the basket in the boot of the car. All I need to do now is take out the rubbish and extra stuff that we don't need. I'm just going to have a wee break though because I've not sat down all day! I also need to have a shower, but that can wait for a wee while. What I really want to do right now is trawl through some food blogs and find a good recipe for fish cakes. It's been a challenge I've wanted to undertake for some time now, and today's the day for getting a recipe or two. Wish me luck :)

21st March 2011

Because I can't think of another title. Because I can't be bothered thinking of another title. Because I can't be bothered with anything, including food. This is bad. I have felt completely useless all day, as if I'm in the way, as if I'm normally holding people up and today is the day they decide to show me. Today I've learnt that I'm the one that stops others from doing their work, and that really depresses me. If people really think this about me, then why don't they tell me before? Because they're scared I might go mental? No fear of that. I'm all talk, no walk, as it were. I don't like confrontation and if it does happen, then I'm silent. I go into defensive mode, and defensive mode = cry. Or maybe that's why people don't tell me things. They're scared I might cry. God, I sound like a sissy. Purely because I am. Really.

For example, if I have to change job, I'll have to cancel my membership to a 24hr gym. Yes, you read that right. I won't have time for the bloomin' thing. What I mean is, I don't want to go on my own. I'm nervous entering a tiny room on my own and a huge gym full of strangers is my idea of hell, especially since there will no doubt be a lot of skinny women there who are trying to achieve size zero. I'm maybe being over-reactive, but I do not want to go on my own. Although, it seems that my partner has been thinking too and doesn't actually want me to go. Booking things behind my back, then telling me when they are, knowing full well that a) I can't make it and b) I'll never go on my own, thus stopping me going at all. Then again, it could be my brain that's telling me to believe all this, but none the less, I've not been told otherwise, so I'll trust my mushy brain. For now.

All in all, today has been completely crap and I feel totally deflated. To make things worse, I really can't be bothered doing anything so I won't even get up to cook myself happy. Maybe this is a good thing since I'd only end up making something sinfully fattening and gluttonous! So in the end, it's probably better I don't move off my fat arse. (Which is only growing fatter by the day, may I add! Stress isn't really good for me!)

So if you can think of a way I can re-inflate myself (get your mind out of the gutter!) then do get in touch. And maybe also if you have a recipe guaranteed to make me happy but won't pile on the pounds, since I don't need any help with that, apparently.

New Blog

Yes, I'm afraid you read that right. But. Do not worry, people. I'll still be using this one for all my memories, thoughts and other random stuff. Like this:

I went to a cookery demonstration last night. Well, that's what it was called but it was anything BUT a cookery demonstration. Firstly, they had a group of kids who were going to sing songs, without a piano, and without starting notes. Brave. Then they proceeded to perform the most random songs, finishing off with "Don't Stop Believin'" by Glee Journey. I'm sorry for all you "Gleeks" out there, but I REALLY can't stand the people or the sounds they pump out of their arses. They really annoy me, they ruin perfectly good songs, and they think they're the coolest people in the world. I think I'm actually going to have to make a post detailing the people I dislike/hate/want to kill if I could get away with it. I'm pretty sure Glee and Justin Bieber would have a pretty hefty fight trying to fight for the top spot on my list. Honestly, I really don't want to hear of Glee ever again in my life. But anyway. I digress.

These kids sang Glee, and I knew my evening was ruined. It only got worse. This "cookery" demonstration was nothing more than posh English idiots* throwing the most random things in a bowl, trying to look like they're trying to be serious but really trying to make the audience - more posh English idiots - laugh. They succeeded, which was no surprise. I was offended by how stupid they were being and it the evening was so far from what I expected that it would be easier for me to walk to Australia. And I can't walk on water. I'm not that good.

*The people who move to "Bonnie Scotland" for the scenery, to live in a little country village, run their 4x4's as if they were lorries and think they're better than REAL Scots. Can you tell I'm not a fan of the English? Sorry, that doesn't sound like I wanted it to. I like SOME of the English, because some are quite nice and really down to earth. But the ones who act as though I'm just a sore on their arse don't deserve any respect. I've done nothing wrong, I don't give you any hassle because of your stupid accent. You don't change the way you speak when you come up here, but you expect us to do that when we come down to your country.


Ohhh dear. Maybe I should just stop there? Yes, perhaps it's better. England, I'm sorry, but you just have to accept that we're just as good as you lot.

Cinnamon French Toast with Creamy Topping and Fruit Compot

Thick bread - I used medium in the recipe but that's all we had in the house
1 egg
Milk
Cinnamon powder
3tbsp frozen berries
Cream cheese
A little water
Icing sugar


Now, this is one of those recipes where you just have to judge the quantities by eye. There are no real measurements and that's what makes this breakfast divine!

Start by placing your berries in a small saucepan over a low-medium heat with 2 tbsp water and 1 tbsp icing sugar. Allow to come to a medium simmer and cook away while you do everything else. 

Beat some cream cheese with a tiny tiny tiny splash of milk and some icing sugar. Taste until it's your desired sweetness. It should be fairly thick but it doesn't have to be. The consistency of softly whipped cream is what I went for and it was so good!

Beat the egg, some milk and 2 tsp cinnamon together in a jug. Pour a third of the mixture onto a large flat plate and dip the bread on both sides until it's totally drenched. Heat a frying pan over a medium heat. Fry the bread until it's golden on both sides. Set aside and keep warm. Repeat the process until you have as much bread as you like.

To serve, layer as follows: bread, creamy stuff, berries, bread, creamy stuff and finally some berry mix on top. Trust me, it's yummy!

Onion and White Stilton Sauce

This recipe is a weird one. No, that didn't sound as I meant it to sound. It's one with mixed reviews in this house. As in, my partner liked it, and I wasn't so keen. It was a bit bitter for me, but I have an incredibly sweet tooth and a neverending love of garlic in steak sauces containing onions. I think I'm going to stop cooking the onions until fully caramelised as suggested by the original recipe. They turn bitter after a while and it sort of spoils the sauce for me. I'm going to give you the recipe though as I'm sure others will enjoy it, and I'll also let you know how I prefer my steak... I expect you to be shocked, really...

This recipe serves two hungry hippo's (the man and me) but multiply as required or reduce the quantities you need if you want to have some self indulgence!

2 thick rump steaks
1 large onion, sliced fairly thinly (cut in half then slice)
1/2 pt double (heavy) cream
As much white stilton as you like - keep tasting as you add a small bit at a time
1/2 pt beef stock in case the sauce becomes too thick and you want it a bit thinner
Seasoning
Olive oil or any other that can stand a high heat


First, heat a griddle pan. Full whack from the word go. You want this to be smoking hot before you put the steak on, so open the windows and doors and be ready to fan the smoke alarm with a towel. I use the helicopter method but whatever works for you.


Place a wide bottomed frying pan over a low-medium heat, add a couple of tablespoons of oil and allow to heat a little. Add the onion and stir until coated with the oil. Allow to caramelise. This could take up to 20 minutes depending on the thickness of the slices. I'd also suggest not letting them get as dark as the picture. When you think they need another few minutes and the thinnest ones are pretty brown, stop.

Once you're ready, add pretty much all the cream and a little stock, stir well and allow to simmer away until the sauce is reduced by roughly half. You can keep adding a little stock now and then if it's looking too thick.


Now that the sauce is a perfect consistency, taste it. If it needs some seasoning, add it. Take a knob of cheese and allow it to melt in the sauce. Taste again. If you're happy with the flavour, stop there. If not, keep going until you're happy. You can ideally use any kind of cheese, including cream cheese or blue cheese. Anything you fancy. Just be sure you're happy with the taste. Add a little more stock than you should and turn the heat right down. This will make sure your sauce isn't too think by the time your steak is done.


For the steak, rub with oil on the "up" side, then season liberally with sea salt and freshly ground black pepper. Place oil side down in the griddle pan and stand back. DO NOT TOUCH THAT STEAK AGAIN UNTIL YOU'RE READY TO TURN IT! I give mine roughly 2 minutes on each side as my partner likes his somewhere between blue and rare. It's the same for me but mine are more on the blue side of life. This means 1 1/2 minutes on each side. Also, I don't rest my steak as they always get cold. It works for me though because once they're on our hot plates, covered with sauce and accompanied by stir-fried veg and chips, they rest a bit. We leave the best bit of the meal for last, which just happens to be the steaks.


To plate up, have your steak on first after you've heated up the plate. Then add whatever accompaniments you wish to add. Be it new potatoes, chips, veg or anything else. Finally, add your sauce and dig in. Yummy :)

Ohhhh dear...

Well this week has, so far, been a complete disaster. If it wasn't for my wonderful partner, I'd have gone totally crazy. Seriously. It's been hell since Sunday night! After working overtime on the checkouts, I didn't get any sleep. Then on Monday, nothing was done by my manager to try and help me get back to work. By Tuesday, I asked again about checkouts and was told that if I didn't fit in with their vacancies, I'd be looking for a job outside of Tesco. It took me talking to my manager after hours to get him to sort something out. Which he never did. I got so angry that when I saw my partner, I was in tears. The manager also hid as soon as he saw him. Wimp. On Wednesday, my back was gradually getting worse and I was pushing myself too hard. When I told my manager about it, he told me again - for the THIRD time - that I might have to look for a job outside of Tesco. But, after me asking a lot of good questions about whether there was any communication between members of staff and him trying to lie his way out of everything, he then accused ME of lying about the changeover being temporary and went to check my notes. By this time, I was fuming and in tears. Other members of staff in my department were very helpful and supportive and I really want to thank them for that. I was then called up to the interview room where my manager was waiting. He never apologised, or said anything else for that matter, but expected me to follow into the room and we both sat down. I was then informed that I was to be put on checkouts as of today. All in all, it takes a lot of work for them to start to help you. And also a lot of clever wording and research beforehand.

Let's just hope that my week gets better from now on. Oh well, I'll just have to cheer myself up by cooking, looking up recipes and thinking about what to make next for dinner. It always cheers me up, so it's worth a shot. Enough ranting. Time for a new post to clear the air.

Chocolate Chip Pancakes

Ok so I'm going to post my first proper recipe, and what better than chocolate chip pancakes? Well, I'll tell you how I ended up making them... My partner and I were a little peckish after we had lunch, so we decided to make dessert. I fancied pancakes and he wanted something with chocolate, and that's when I suggested chocolate chip pancakes. And I must say, they were bloomin' good! In fact, I'll issue a warning with them: When you make them, eat them straight out of the pan. I know, it sounds silly, but do it. You can thank me later :)

10 tbsp self raising flour
5 tbsp caster sugar
1/2 tsp baking powder
2 tbsp golden syrup
1 very large egg (or two small ones)
Milk - enough to keep the batter thick
1 bag chocolate chips - around 200g


In a large bowl, sift in the dry ingredients and gently stir together. Gradually whisk in the milk, then crack the egg into a seperate bowl and add to the large bowl. Whisk until fully blended with the flour mix and no lumps remain in the mix. Finally, add the choc chips and give the batter a quick stir.

Heat a non-stick frying pan on a medium heat - on my cooker, it was setting 8 since mine goes up to 12! Put a tiny bit of oil in the pan and wipe it round with a bit of kitchen roll so just a thin coating remains. Once your pan is up to heat, use a ladel and spoon two small pancakes into the pan. Now, I say small but really, they're going to stretch out quite a lot, so half a ladelful per pancake is more than enough. Trust me. 

Leave your pancakes until bubbles appear on the surface. Don't be tempted to keep checking up on the underside because it won't be ready and you just get stressed out and don't want to wait any longer. So, just leave them, put the kettle on, then go back and look for bubbles - this could take up to 3 minutes. I suggest you only do one pancake for a start to check for temperature and timings according to your own cooker, then carry on making more.

Once the bubbles start to appear (there won't be many) then you can turn them over. DON'T FLIP THEM!!! You only end up with a massive mess on the floor if you're anything like me. Turn them with a spatula/fish slice thing and leave them for a couple of minutes.


Once they're done, either store them on a plate wrapped in a clean dish towel or you can just eat them right away. Try one right away and try not to smile as the chocolate seeps out of the sweet batter... I'm drooling again!

This mix makes between 8 and 12 pancakes, depending on the size they turn out to be. Enjoy :)

The Last Few Days.

Well, I felt neglected the past week until Monday night. I decided that I should talk to the man about how I was feeling and I almost wish I didn't. We had a bit of a fight about it all but, in the end, we got it all sorted out. I'm so glad we did because it meant we talked things through and got our feelings out in the open - which is very important. It also brought us closer, allowed us to see that we'd been drifting and work out why it happened. It was awesome, if I'm honest.

I also cleared out the living room yesterday since the phone man was coming up at some point. Had a lovely lunch of pork and leek sausages, chips and gravy in the living room, then watched Princess and the Frog on the widescreen. Then I put the man to bed and we landed up watching Lee Evans while cuddling then getting up to watch more TV and progress onto eating supper. Once I got him back in bed, we watched Captain Scarlet for a while, then I left him to sleep while I went to watch Bedlam. What a good programme it is! That and Mike and Molly.

Anyways. I really should get going. I have another driving lesson today and I can't wait! Just need to have a shower and then get myself ready since I'm meeting the man after he's finished. I can't wait :) Think it's Burger King day. 

Speak later.

Dx

Finally.

At last, I've booked the accommodation for the Musselburgh Festival, held in Polmont. I can't wait! Not only is it a time to meet up with all our friends, but it's also a weekend away for us to spend some quality time together. It will also let us both have a good drink on the Saturday night after the competitions, and then once we get back to the digs, we can stick on the laptop and snuggle up to watch a film. It'll be really good, I think. It's something we really need to do.

On another subject, I had my first lesson with my new instructor and can I just say, WOW! What a difference. He's so good at pushing me forward in a way I know how to deal with. He gave me the confidence to just drive and make the right decisions, and if I couldn't then he helped me work out what was best to do. He helped me immensely and I'm glad to have booked another lesson with him. I'm looking forward to it already! In fact, I was buzzing before I even got out of his car. So much so, that I couldn't quite shut up about it for the rest of the evening. But personally, I think it's good to be enthusiastic about these kind of things, because if I'm not, then I won't put everything I have into it and I won't pass. But tally ho. This, alarmingly, is not the reason I came on here tonight.


The baby thing. I'm getting really scared. Is it normal to walk around the supermarket with your partner, and he's the one pointing out all the cute stuff and brings up the conversation every time? I don't mean "is it healthy", I mean is it right to do it now? We've only been together for a year, we're living at mine, we're not engaged, married and nor do we have plans to do either anytime soon. I'm also looking to get into university, so that essentially ties up my life for the next few years. Is a family something I can think about while I'm studying? Can it really work out, or would it be better to quit my studies if the inevitable was to happen? It's just that lately, it's been a really big topic that I've seen frequently occurring between us and it's starting to cause a bit of panic in my little brain.

I'm definitely not ready for the whole motherhood thing, and if you asked any of my friends how I am around children, they'd just look at you and then proceed to laugh until there was no air left in their lungs. That's how bad I am. However, I am much mother nurturing nowadays since I started looking after myself and my partner a bit better. This begs the question of whether I'd actually be ok looking after my own child, or would I be as bad as I've been with other people's little ones? I just don't know. I suppose the whole thing scares me, but at the same time it intrigues me and it's something I really, really want, and find myself wanting more every day. That in itself is a terrifying though.


By the way, have you noticed in this last post that I'm starting to sound a bit like Carrie Bradshaw?

Valentines Weekend

Oh. My. God. I met the man in Aberdeen on Saturday so we could make up for the night before and just spend some time together. We seriously needed it, but holy cow, the number of people in town yesterday was completely stupid! Of course, it was a Saturday, but also Valentine's weekend where people were going round, hand in hand, doing last minute shopping for a day which celebrates something which should be shown the whole year round - not just one day. Really, do we live in a society which people can only show their love to their partners for one day during the year? I'd be ashamed if that was the case. I make a point of trying to share my love with my partner every day, because if you don't, you're only living for that one day, and that isn't enough, if I'm honest.

Since today's the last day of being together without having to work, we're treating ourselves to steak for lunch and most likely pancakes with white chocolate sauce afterwards! Yummy! :) I've also sorted out my driving lessons - again. I have a new instructor since the other one has cancelled every lesson we arranged since my first one. I was meant to be getting every Tuesday and Friday, but they've all been cancelled and even the one we rearranged was cancelled because she had other people wanted lessons. How annoying! But, new instructor sorted and I start on Thursday! Boost!

Only bugger is... I'm back to work tomorrow. Gah! That means I'm up at 4.30am for a shower and out of the house by 5.15am at the latest. Oh for goodness sake. I don't want to go. Although, I've been told by the doctor that if I'm sore, I need to phone him back and I'll get signed off again. But I might just try and get put onto checkouts if I'm sore and then transfer permanently, meaning better hours! Yahoo! We'll see though. It would be so much better working on checkouts, plus I know I wouldn't be doing my back any more injury by doing that. It sounds lazy, but I'd rather be called lazy than be in that kind of pain every day because I can't do that. It's been bad enough without doing any hard work, let alone pushing those trolleys. But hey hey, I better go now because I need sleep.

Nighty night. Oh, and I love you honey :) xxx

Baby Talk!

In the past few days, baby talk has been everywhere! Every channel, every programme, newspaper, magazine and website. Is there no getting away from it? I know I was thinking about it the other day, but this is getting ridiculous now! I don't want to think about it anymore. In fact, I don't want to think about it until the time comes. So why must everything remind me of the one thing I don't want to think about? It's rather frustrating. I mean, come on, I'm 20. I shouldn't really be planning children yet. I'm only planning on going to university and being with the man. Nothing further.

And again he's running late. He should have been home a while ago, and he said he was on his way. Unless he's gone in past to speak to the folk at the restaurant to rearrange for Sunday... We're meant to be having dinner on Monday, but since he's off on Monday, and we're both working on Tuesday, it makes more sense to eat on Sunday and have Monday together just to snuggle and be together. So we'll see what happens. If he's back soon I'll know he's been sorting dinner. If he's ages yet, then I know he's at his mum's doing something random. Either way, I miss him and want him home so that we get a little time before he goes to sleep, otherwise it's going to be a very lonely day for me. It doesn't help that I get excited when I hear a loud vehicle and it turns out to be one of many tractors working around here. Although, I know the sound of his engine and it's definitely coming up the road now. Yep, here he is. Yay :) I'll be back later to write while he's asleep. Just want him to know I love him and am always going to be here. He's my soulmate. 

I got a bit soppy there, didn't I? Oh well. It's true.

Realisation time

Today I've been thinking. About how lucky I am, how much I'd lose if I lost the man in my life, what the rest of my life will be like if we stayed together. To put it bluntly, I don't want to be without him and I don't think he wants to be without me. I mean, yesterday we were watching Jeremy Kyle and a few people were on the stage discussing a kid which had no stability in its life, when he said that if "that" ever happened to us, at least he'd be home early. I asked him what he was talking about, and he just said "what they're talking about on tv". I assumed he was talking about children, and he was. I mentioned how his work was perfect, since I could put the child to school before going to teach, and then he'd be there to pick it up after school before I came home and look after it until I got home. Then it would be supper time and I could put them both to bed at the same time. It was just a joke from me, but then he asked how long my university course is. I told him it was 4 years and he just laughed and said that it might be before I've finished my course. That made me a little scared, if I'm really honest... Kids before I've finished university wasn't my idea of how things would be. I wanted to be married before I had children. In an ideal world, I wanted uni over, into a stable job, wedding, then a year before we had kids, but I guess we'd be cutting it fine if we did that, so maybe it'll be kids before the end of uni and married after I've finished. I suppose we'll work it all out, come time. It's just a bit scary.

However, I must struggle on, regardless of what's blighting my mind. My man's running about an hour late because he was talking to some of his workmates. Typical. But I don't blame him really. Some of them are leaving. One got sacked this morning, another walked out and another is leaving in a couple of weeks. Good grief...

Anyways I really need to start planning my birthday party, and get the whole lot sorted out since I really want a marquee and an amazing night where we party until dawn, laugh so much, have many, many photos to remember everything by and, most of all, tunes lasting right through the night. I'd also like to do something for Mum since it'll be on her birthday and we've never done anything so far to say thank you to the ICU in Aberdeen where they looked after her. So it's about time we did something. Or maybe the nurses at the Maternity Hospital in Aberdeen since they helped Mum when I was born after a long period of labour and not breathing. It's thanks to them that I'm here today, so maybe it's time I thanked them properly. So that's it. Aberdeen Maternity Hospital it is. Well, possibly. I'll discuss it with dad and Andrew since they both mean a lot to me and I value their opinion.

Talking about Andrew reminds me... I'm REALLY excited for Valentine's day, since I've never really had one before and it's all new to me. I honestly can't wait, but I don't know what I should get the man, if anything, or what to do, wear, anything! He's taking me out for dinner, which is still a very new thing to me, and I don't know what to expect. I'm just really excited for it and can't wait for it. Also, very intrigued as to what I might get. He's got a habit of totally surprising me with the odd random gift.

Anyways, off to get into bed and snuggle.

Night.

Dx

Snow again!

Oh for crying out loud! There's snow falling and lying and sitting about. Please don't tell me this is a repeat of last year where we had lots of snow in February and it stayed until April, making it near impossible to get to a wedding? Oh please no :( I just want to get out and do my lessons, get my test, pass it, and then I'm happy for there to be as much snow as the world wants. I just want my license first!

Oh well, I must look ahead to the festival times. Musselburgh is coming up and I haven't done anything for it, or booked accommodation. I've sourced rooms, cheaper than last year, and more comfortable too! It's just a pain that they don't let pets stay :( So I doubt dad will be coming since he'll want to look after the dog, who would be happy sleeping in the car, but there we go. I think he's in a bit of a huff for festivals since Donald's always with me, but it makes sense, because then I am never left to be lonely and there's someone to sit with him when I'm not there. Last year, dad got sick of being on his own and left me at the festival near Edinburgh while he drove home and I had to fork out for an expensive train where I didn't get a seat and had no sleep at all. So here's hoping I get to keep the car and he can go home and be picked up by one of his siblings. But we'll see what happens. There's bound to be people coming from our area who can take him home if he really wants. I won't plan too far ahead. Just need to catch him when he's not out or up in the loft. I am NOT going up there just to ask about hotels.

I also really need to get some stuff for uni sorted out, since my interview is around 18 days away and there's more paperwork they want before the day. And I need to work on my piano. Maybe I could do that now that he's up in the loft out of the way. I hate playing music in front of him at home. 


Anyways. I made a casserole for lunch. I had hoped to play it safe (again) and make the casserole as I usually would - in the oven. But. I was browning part of the beef when I thought to check for a packet of mix. None. Oh dear. I'd just written out a casserole recipe earlier, so through to my bedroom I went to get it and start on it. Well, the end results need a tiny bit of tweaking, but it's all good and next time I'll document what I do and take photos. I'm so surprised I managed to make it though and that it turned out eadible. I'm so impressed!

However, I'm unsure on what to cook for supper. There's very little to have in the fridge, so it'll have to be something out of the freezer since the butcher's shut and I really fancied some steak. Possibly pizza? Because I really can't be bothered doing anything else or anything exciting. 


Time for sleep since I have my lesson soon. And I'm shattered. Nighty night.


Dx

My Stummy Hurts

Well, our tummies hurt. I don't know why, but they've both been sore today, just at separate times... It's been very strange. Thankfully he's asleep now because he's working tomorrow, but he'll only get a few hours, so it won't be enough. He'll come home absolutely wrecked but at least he's off on Tuesday.

Speaking of Tuesday, I have my second driving lesson =D and I can't wait! Although I'm dreading having to drive that blooming BMW thing again. It's murder to handle =( but tally-ho. Dvd time. And maybe time to get some food too! I'm off here for a night. Toodleoo!

Dx

Morning, morning.

I'm awake, up and have got a huge mug of coffee and some krispbakes with garlic and herb philly. I told you I was hooked. I'm heading into town today to pick up the man's phone, so here's hoping they give it to me. They'll try and wriggle their way out of it because I'm not him, but they WILL give me it, because if I can talk to doctors on behalf of him then I can collect his bloomin' phone from the idiots at Vodafone. And no, I'm not being nasty towards them, just truthful. I'm with Vodafone myself, but they're really quite stupid. Anyways, so I'm getting the train in, collecting the mobile and then meeting the man at 12.30. You know what, I really should give him a name on here since I don't want to use his real name. How about... Andrew? Yes, that'll do nicely. Andrew. And if he reads this, he'll be wondering what's going on and think I have another man. I'd never do that, so he shouldn't worry. 

I would really like to have a nosey around shops, but I've not got much left to spend now, since my bills are now due out and I have only got £40 in my purse to do me for a couple of weeks. Oh well, it'll be absolutely fine since I have a stash of money for driving lessons and I'm saving up all my unused change. I must have about £100 quid of it so far! Andrew's taking over his gallon bottle too so we can save together. Good idea, me thinks.

Well I'll be back for another post tonight/tomorrow, so I'll catch you then. Toodleoo!

Dx

Evening Ponderings

It's that time of night again where I'm sitting up in bed with the man curled up beside me, sound asleep, the dog sound-oh at our feet and a film on the telly. All that's missing is something tasty and delightful to munch on. I'm thinking about some Pogen Wholegrain Krisprolls   served with some philly cheese, and a bit of philly's light garlic and herb spread, which is so yummy! I've been missing out on that for so long! It's actually a lot easier to spread than the original cheese spread, so that's a blessing. It's so smooth and creamy, and the garlic's there but definitely does NOT overpower the flavour of the cheese. The herbs are a really lovely addition to the flavour mix and, all in all, it's a delicious savoury spread and oh so yummy with the krisprolls, which together help eliminate some of my recent "munchies".

Honestly, I'm not sure why they're so bad right now, but I'm finding it bloody difficult getting rid of them at times. So hard that I've started taking note of what I'm eating, trying to drink a lot more instead of munching on whatever I can get hold of beside me, and trying to make sure my meals are as nutritionally filling and healthy as possibly which is turning out to be a hell of a balance for me to reach. How is it done? Seriously? I can't work it out. We eat loads of vegetables with every meal now, a bit of protein and some carbohydrates. Maybe I need to eat more brown pasta instead of mashed tatties? I guess I'll work it out eventually.

But today, I've decided I really need to start and lose weight. I was looking at elliptical trainers in the Argos catalogue, but the ones I can afford have a maximum weight limit of 15st 7lbs, and let's be fair, I'm over that limit by a fair bit. So, my target for the next 2 months is to lose 1st 7lbs to make sure I'm at that weight. Any more lost and it would be a blessing! So, from tomorrow onwards, I'm going to be brave and post my weight up for the world to see, so you can all keep track of my weight loss/gain - whichever happens first! I would do it tonight, but I'm keeping the man awake with the TV and light and laptop. He's ever so good sleeping all through that. I don't really think he woke up since what he said to me didn't make a lick of sense. Something about shitty green trainers? I don't know. Apparently they were keeping him awake. Personally, I think his back was doing it. I do feel guilty though, because if I only had a laptop that would type quietly, then it would be absolutely fine since I dim the screen a lot. I just think it's the general sound that keeps him from drifting off to a deep sleep. Poor honey.

Enough ramblings for now. Maybe a weight blog to come, but we'll see how I'm feeling, given that it's 10.42pm!

Dx

Find your inner butch!

Today, I want to set a goal for myself: No fighting with the man, and to stop eating crap. The second bit has really failed, because all I've done since I woke up yesterday is eat. I really can't stop. However, I've found that if I have something healthy and crunchy, then I'm less tempted to snack. So maybe I should stock up on those Pogen Krisprolls I bought for a trial. They're healthy, really crispy and so so tasty on their own, even better with a light spreading of Philadelphia cream cheese. Sooooo tasty =D I've also just put on lunch. Oven roasted chicken portions, rubbed with salt, pepper and olive oil. They looked so yummy before I put them in, and I can't wait to see how they look once they're out. Although, what to have with them? Maybe stir-fry veg and a baked tattie if I can get hold of dad to take some new tatties home.


Honestly, there's nothing like having a supply of fresh, homegrown tatties to use in all my cooking. They're tastier than the ones you buy in the shops, and I know exactly where they've come from. Besides, there's none of this "organic" rubbish about them. Come on, it's impractical to grow it, because the costs are so high, and compared to the useable yield you get, it's pathetic and not worth the bother. Living on a farm has given me a taste of how it should really be done. None of this "organic" grain or straw or hay to feed our animals. How is nitrogen fertiliser bad, anyways? You're giving the plants EXACTLY what they need and get from the atmosphere. You're just giving them it in an easier form and they are able to get a lot more of it. I just don't agree with the organic thinking that this country has nowadays. It's all beef, chicken, pork or lamb. There is no difference in the animals. Let them eat what they want to eat, regardless of how it's produced. Our animals are tasty because they get good food and lots of it. They're not neglected and they don't want for anything because they're well looked after, allowed to go outside when they like, and have shelter if they want to use it. My dad must be one of the hardest working farmers, and the livestock are better for it.

Geez, that was a fair rant, but you get my point. There's no point in organic when you know what the animals are being given anyway. I just love tasty things, which is why I still write in this blog and enjoy reading other peoples findings about food and how to cook it, eat it and know when it's at it's best. I really do love my food, don't I? I think that's why I love eating, because I love flavours, colours, textures and mostly it just happens to be somewhat healthy. Or meat. I can't not eat meat. If I was told I could never eat meat again, I'd cry and go absolutely mental!

What's happened?

Good grief, something's awfully wrong with me. Firstly, I'm signed off with sciatica for 2 weeks, so no heavy trollies for me! Secondly, I've had the terrible urge to buy trackies. Yes, like PROPER trackies. And today, good people, I'm sorry to say I actually bought 2 pairs! And a pair of black lonsdale trainers. They're pretty though, and very comfy. I just look like a total chav, which is unfortunate given the comfort I'm experiencing...

Back to the...well...back situation, I'm off for two weeks with this nerve that's been troubling me. Doc sas it's sciatica, so that's just bloomin' dandy, isn't it!? Saying that, I'm very glad. I'm getting sick of the way some of the people there treat you. They act as though you're a complete idiot, incapable of asking others in the right department whether something is in stock or not. Grr. So time off will hopefully help me get rid of the stress of dealing with that. It'll also give me time to get the house in order. Hopefully.

If I wasn't so sore, I'd be clearing up the living room, getting lots of washing done, but I think I'll attempt that once I'm home from my driving lesson tomorrow. I just hope it's actually on, since I've heard nothing from my instructor as to whether it's going ahead and when I'm meeting her or anything. I'm just so excited though, and would be dreadfully disappointed if I didn't get to have my lesson: the lesson which I'm so nervous about it's scary. I know I shouldn't be, but I really can't help it. I'm just so excited to be finally doing something about my test and a step closer to getting my license. Wouldn't that be awesome, not having to wait for someone else to sit beside me, but instead just sit down in the car and bugger off myself. T'would be grand.

Saying that, I might still use the train for our random jaunts into Aberdeen, since it's cheaper and we're right in the centre of town without having to park or scutter about in traffic, risking life and limb by driving beside old people. Seriously, they're dangerous!

Anyhoo... I'm going to head to bed. Driving lesson in the morning and then meet the hubby for coming home. Woop! Goodnight, bloobs!

D x

Ugh.

Tired. So, so tired. Yet, I don't want to go to bed. The man's already asleep, and I'm feeling really lonely, especially since I've hardly had any real contact with him all day. I don't know, it's been weird today, because we've been together, and yet it feels like I haven't seen him or been able to speak to him and I don't like that. Plus my back's killing me. I'm off work tomorrow so that's a bonus I guess, and we're going into Aberdeen tomorrow which means we'll be having a day out to ourselves, so it should be good. But, what if it's like today and we hardly actually speak? Or he gets distracted like he's been all day? I can't help wondering... or worrying. Time to watch a cooking programme to take my mind off the world and it's wife.

Kitchen Antics

Well, we rearranged the kitchen a bit yesterday. We swapped over the fryer and the food processor, since I use the processor more and it should be beside the cooker. I know I only bought it on Saturday, but I use it so much for making stir fries and no doubt for other countless things as recipes become available for me! It sounds lazy, but it'll save me taking ages to slice veg, and it'll do a lot of the work I do for some other recipes, like my curry paste, a lot better than the mini processor we had. Put it this way: it would work perfectly, until you put any sort of food into it. So it's gone and the new one is here. Hallelujah! I do need to investigate new recipes though... because, as much as I love stir fries, I can't eat them every day (unfortunately). So that's what I might do today, since my back is killing me and I can hardly move. Or I could just lie here, but I might get bored.

I really should be getting on with the washing, but it's cold in the rest of the house, I'm comfy(ish) in bed, and I'm a lot warmer too. Plus everything's at floor level which means bending at some stage and picking up a heavy basket, so I'm not going to do that either. Thankfully, I've managed to get an appointment for the doctors. It's an emergency one, but I didn't think that seeing a nurse or having someone phone me back would be all that helpful. Just need to get out of bed in time to get to the surgery! I just hope they can do something to make this less painful and it doesn't turn out to be something serious that I have. Ha, knowing my luck it'll be something incurable and that's going to turn me into a hunchback. Wouldn't that be a laugh! Nah, didn't think so.

Time to go and attempt to get up. I only have 20 minutes to be in the surgery.  And it's a 10 minute drive. 10 minutes to get out of bed and ready. Ohhhh dear....